3 Tips on being a good mom

Although my kids are still young, I wouldn't consider myself a "new mom" anymore. I certainly don't consider myself an expert in parenting, nor do I have everything figured out. But, having gone through my experiences, and talking with other moms I know this:

1. You can't be the best mom you can be unless you're good to yourself. Don't fall into the trap of feeling you always have to do for others and put yourself last. Take care of yourself, feel good about yourself, and have some fun. You will be a much better mom, I guarantee. There is nothing worse than a frazzled unfulfilled mom. Don't you think your kids deserve to see their mom happy!

2. Your kids don't care if the house is dirt free and all the toys are neatly in the toy box. If you are one that is constantly cleaning evaluate how much time is spent on this and the reasons why (although I'm not advocating you live in filth!). Is it stressing you out or are you burning yourself out? Take a little time to forget the mess and go outside and play, or go somewhere fun. The house will always be there, but your precious 2 year old will be grown up before you know it. Give them fun memories that will stay with them.

3. You can never have it all and don't kill yourself trying. I don't know anyone who has perfect kids, a perfect house, lots of patience, a perfect body, the perfect job, and a perfect marriage. Don't beat yourself up over these things. Everyone I've met who seemed to have it all together slowly became a "real person" as I got to know them. Some of us hide our imperfections and shortcomings very well. Or, maybe our issues aren't visible at all. Maybe you are a spendaholic, a TVaholic, a closet eater. If you have a problem, work on it. But, don't compare yourself to others unless you are using them as a model of where you want to be.

Being a mom is tough whether you stay at home, or work outside the home. I don't think we'll ever feel 100% adequate. However, if we feel we are doing our best, that's all anyone can ask for!

Hi Ho Hi Ho, it's off to work I go...

It's been about 4 1/2 years since I "retired." I had worked almost 5 years for XenoTech in Lenexa and quit my job to focus on other ventures. Fast forward to today, and I have two kids that are wonderful, but deserve more than I can give them at home. Brooklyn needs preschool! I always wanted to be a stay at home mom, but realized this past year, that I'm not quite cutting it.

Here's some examples. For starters, I hate how the constant demandingness (spell check is contending that's not a word, but I'm leaving it in) of the kids is wearing me down leaving me with little patience most of the time. Not their fault, mine. Secondly, I can't tell you how many times a day Brooklyn asks to watch TV. OK, she's bored, I get it. Lastly, my email checking is out of control...wondering every 30 minutes or so if there is an adult out there that has something to say to me. I think we all get the picture here.

So, on the Aug 25th, I will go back to XenoTech on MWF's servings as an executive administrator to the CEO, CFO, and COO. I will be working with a great group of people and am quite looking forward to it. I'm sure there will be days I'll wonder why I ever decided to subject myself to the early mornings and daycare routines, but I really feel I'm doing the best thing for our whole family. Besides, I'm using it as an excuse to buy some new clothes! I doubt swishy pants and running shorts will be acceptable in the office.

Another chapter ends

For us, moving to our new house was the end of one chapter in our lives, and the start of a new one. This was planned and we felt good about it. Unfortunately, we had something sprung on us recently. The death of our 96 Jeep Cherokee that we purchased in 1998. Despite cosmetic issues and pending transmission work, we planned to keep it several more years. However, long story short, it took a turn for the worse a few weeks ago and we had to sell it...for scrap. Life sure throws out curve balls sometimes. I agree this wasn't horrible, like a sickness in the family or loss of a job, but it was money we hadn't planned on spending. The end of the story is that we now have a new Toyota Yaris which "sips" gas (this term is laughable to me because it's 2008 and cars get the same mpg as they did in the 1980's) and should be a reliable car for years to come. Only problem, it's a stick, and I don't know how to drive one. Haven't been very successful the few times I've tried years back. I'm sure that will be a blog sometime in the future! Until then, I'll let Orin enjoy his new car!